"Life begins at the end of your comfort zone."

~Neale Donald Walsch

When was the last time you left it? 

Was it last week, when you decided to dine alone at the hip new restaurant that opened in your neighbourhood?

Or was it last month, when you paid the deposit on a two-week holiday to somewhere you’ve never been before?

Or was it last year, when you accepted a new position at a different company?

Or was it ten years ago, when you left home for the first time to backpack around a foreign country with your best friend?

If you’re not sure whether you’ve left your comfort zone lately, or if it’s been quite a while, it’s time you asked yourself two questions:

1. When was the last time you experienced true joy and happiness?

2. Are you living a life you love, a life you will be proud of when you’re at the end, looking back?

Comfort zones are cozy and warm and safe. This can make it difficult to leave even if you have aspirations of doing something new, or different, or appealing. 

But…

they’re also predictable, boring, and mundane. 

And if you’re longing for more, if you have goals and dreams and a desire to live to your full potential, you have to leave your comfort zone behind. 

Feelings of uncertainty and anxiety can crop up when contemplating leaving and the familiarity of what you already know feels like a safer choice. This makes it harder to take that first step. It’s way easier to stay where you’re comfortable and you feel safe. 

It’s why you play it safe and live life on the sidelines, admiring and even envying others who are brave enough to go after what you truly want. 

But by choosing to stay safe, you will never get to experience all that life has to offer, and you will never become the person you were meant to be. 

So if you have a nagging feeling that your life was supposed to turn out differently, here’s a reminder that you only get one life and it’s up to you to choose which path you’re going to take. 

If you are tired of being an onlooker in your own life and you are done with the status quo, then it is time to choose a different path than the one you’re currently on.

This one might be more challenging, it might feel harder or it might make you uncomfortable at first. There might be some obstacles along the way and there may be some joyful discoveries too. This path might push you out of your comfort zone and demand a bit more of you, but in my experience, this is where the magic truly happens. 

Magic could be…

Meeting the love of your life and spending the rest of your life with them

Sharing a deep friendship with someone who supports and encourages you to be the best version of yourself

Going on worldly adventures that make your heart happy and your soul soar

Finding new passions that add so much pleasure to your life

Pursuing your purpose and embracing a meaningful life 

These are the experiences that make life worth living. 

It’s what makes you excited to wake up every morning, ready to take on the day. 

It’s what you’ll remember most fondly at the end of your life, looking back. 

A powerful exercise to try is the funeral meditation (adapted from Forsyth & Eifert, 2016):

Imagine, in as much detail as you can, the celebration of your life that is held after you pass away. Imagine the faces of the people attending, the music playing in the background, the atmosphere as your life is fondly remembered.

Focus on what is being shared about your life. How are you being remembered? What are people saying about you, about how you lived? Take a moment to reflect and jot the answer down.

Now ask yourself, what would you like them to say? How would you like to be remembered after you’re gone? What is the legacy you’re leaving behind? Write it down.

Notice if there is a big difference between the two sets of questions. This should tell you something about which path you want to take going forward. 

You are the only one who can change your life, so if you want a different life, you have to start living differently.

Take the reins and change direction. As Iris was reminded, "You're supposed to be the leading lady of your own life, for god's sake!" so start acting like it. 

Start with something small to expand your bubble a little further. Try a new food. Go for a walk in a new neighbourhood. Practice a new hobby. 

Every day try to do something new that forces you to be a little bit more uncomfortable.

Because every time you do, your confidence will grow, and you’ll become more comfortable with being uncomfortable. And each step you take will be moving you closer to living a life you love.